Eggroll, Bagel, Cookie, Vengeance

The Four Ninja Food Groups

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Pirate pride, ninja nay-saying

Thank you Chris for the great article, you can link to the article in its orignal context here.
Kristy in PA sent me this link, we have her to blame.

Pirate pride, ninja nay-saying
By Chris Holt
Opinions Columnist


Alright, that does it. I'm tired of these ceaseless "debates" that are nothing more than one group talking at the other, spewing venom without making any head way. Our campus has been in an uproar over this last week; things have been tenser than a Newsweek editors' meeting.

I'm talking, of course, about the annoying debate between the Ninjas and the Pirates. Last week was the beginning of Ninja Respect Month and also Pirate Pride Week, a scheduling conflict that is equivalent to hosting a presidential address the same night as the World Series.

Although The Daily reported about Ninja Pride Week, the Pirates were remarkably absent in the press. When I went to White Plaza, though, all I saw was Pro-Pirate demonstrations. The Pirates had planned a "Blackpearl Remembrance Day" that happened to coincide with Ninja Week. Both groups held rallies peacefully, but their sentiments were about as peaceful as an A's fan-base.

It all centers on what happened several decades ago. The Pirates and the Ninjas had an altercation that they to this day, are still fighting about. Something about a pirate wench they both claimed, I dunno. She's pretty old now, bruised and rough. But they are still fighting over her.

No, instead of flipping out and killing everyone as an unstoppable partnership that would leave robots, chickens, and robot chickens in fear, they remain divided.

Unfortunately, despite our progressive-minded university's best intentions, no one has curbed this hatred. While both groups speak of "pride" for their group and claim that they want "peace," such statements always preclude bashing the other group. Being pro-Ninja means that you condone Ninja killings of Pirates, or that you are Anti-Piratical. It's them or us. You can't show pride in being a Pirate or a Ninja without then saying how "the Ninjas are yellow-bellied bastards" or "the Pirates lack honor or good hygiene."

The rest of this article can be found here. at the Stanford Daily.

14 Comments:

Blogger Dark said...

Dude, totally dig what you're preaching. I was all "Ninja's are awesome" with my friend Kenny and he was all "Nah, man, Pirates are where it's AT" and now the only communication we have is the scrawled missives we leave with the blood of the dogs we nail to each other's treehouses. Most of the words we use are cuss-words too, so, you know, that's bad.

1:24 PM  
Blogger The Smoker said...

Although I found myself laughing at the absurdity, I had this constant nagging feeling I wasn't in on the whole joke, and that in reality everyone who was "in on" the joke was laughing at me for laughing while not being "in on it". Needless to say this has greatly disturbed me, and caused me to seek counseling. I'll just send you guys the bill to avoid the mess of a lawsuit. Thank you for your time.

7:37 PM  
Blogger Albert L Berriz said...

Nice bloggin'

Cool stuff you've got here. Check out free cognition, I think you'll enjoy it.

7:56 PM  
Blogger Mr. Furious said...

This is really just the tip of a much larger, more vicious iceberg of ignorance. Pirates are nothing more than growling vessels of wrath. Ninjas are just elitist, silky tyrants of pain. We know these things. What we fail to recognize is that all of us are simply taking sides as a way to project our differences onto a more tangible, polarized conflict. By doing so we not only fan the flames of a nasty pirate-ninja dispute, we also push ourselves into an artificial conflict and perpetuate the virtual carnage.

9:19 AM  
Blogger Courtney said...

This made me laugh. I love this post. By the way, I'm Pro-Pirate.

11:11 PM  
Blogger im here somewhere said...

I would love to crawl around in this guys head for a while. Just think what he'd say if the teenage mutant ninja turtles went to neverland for a week..that would be fun to see

7:24 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

what the hell is this Ninja nad Pirate crap?

10:12 AM  
Blogger Dan said...

Ninja pride all the way haha. Think about it though, a highly trained ninja assassin would own a pirate any day of the week *nods*

I totaly dig your blog man, two thumbs up.

~Dan

12:38 PM  
Blogger cape said...

It's a great site
How did you decide on the dsign - how do you set up the hyml to get that layout. It's great.
capetownpeter

11:52 PM  
Blogger Stochastic Jack said...

Typical. Pirates, Ninja, Pirates, Ninja... Who gets left out of the discussion?

Rogues, that's who. Rogues and Ne'er-do-wells. We Rogues are nothing more than pawns in a vast Pirate/Ninja conspiracy. We can do anything a Pirate or a Ninja can do, but do we ever get mentioned? Raiding the high seas? Creeping in and out of bedrooms in the middle of the night? Rogues can do all that, plus stylishly dressed and with a single red rose clenched in our perfect teeth.

Feh, I say.

8:55 AM  
Blogger schmims said...

What's a pirate's favorite kind of socks?


ARRRRgyle!

8:05 AM  
Blogger Johnny Butane said...

I am a proud pirate.

So pround in fact...9or is that geeky?)

that me and a buddy are making a text based multi player in the PTTC world


YARRRR

7:28 PM  
Blogger Johnny Butane said...

wow typo's galore

to the rouge dude thats the same thing as a pirate capitain look at jack sparrow LOOK AT HIM lol

7:30 PM  
Blogger Red-Alert2 said...

Pirates are People too!
I'm more pro pirate than Pro Ninja, mostly cause pirates are the underdogs in my area of the web.
Why would Pirates get such a great movie with Captain Jack Sparrow in it if they didn't pwn ninjas?! All Ninjas can do is sneak around and assassinate (sp?) people, Pirates roam the seas taking what they please, they've got the treasure, the ships, the guns, and the babes, what more could you ask for?!
Pirates own! Although, that ninja website is pretty awesome: http://www.realultimatepower.net/

Then again, Pirates play a huge role in The novel To Kill a Mockingbird: http://www.stanford.edu/~scodary/tkam.htm

~R-A2~

8:31 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home